- Awareness: You need to be aware that you are in a difficult situation before you can act on it with deliberation. It may be difficult to be self-aware, so you need time to reflect on your situation each day. There is a snafu in this, however. People tend to be too introspective for a self-serving purpose instead of being on a “fact-finding mission.” Basically, we all need to take time to examine our satisfaction and stress in the moment without emotional judgement. We need to be aware of our challenges before we can do anything else. Research shows that people who view challenges as growth opportunities, grow – and people who are in similar challenges, but are unaware that growth is possible, do not grow as much. In fact, some of the latter group might become fearful.
- Acceptance: Denial does not give way to solutions. Spinning your wheels into a “Life’s not fair” mentality will not get anything accomplished. John O’Sullivan to his daughter when she claims that life isn’t fair... “You are 100% correct. Life isn’t fair. You were born in the United States. You have food and clothing. You are absolutely correct. Life is not fair. It’s in your favor.” Even IF something in your life is completely unfair, saying so doesn’t magically change the situation. Perception: Are you looking at it wisely or emotionally? Emotions are perfectly natural, but you want to consciously use rational thoughts. FINALLY: If the situation is indeed out of your control, you need to figure out how you are going to mentally accept that. In fact, research shows that there are health benefits when you Kelly McGonigal: Make Stress Your Friend.
- Awareness and Acceptance of your challenge will help you overcome fear. Don't get imprisoned by the anxiety of fear. (Napoleon Hill: Overcoming Fear)
- Acceptance includes recognizing your mistakes and setbacks without judgment — seeing them as real, factual, and useful data instead of threats to your identity. How Tennis Players Learn from Mistakes
- Your perspective and your perception of your path is critical. (Simon Sinek on Simon Sinek: The Power of Your Thoughts.)
- “Everything can be taken from a person but one thing: the last of human freedoms to choose one’s attitude in any set of given circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” Viktor Frankl
- “When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” Viktor Frankl
- “Remember, it is not the job itself that brings fulfillment, but our own mindset and attitude towards it. Find contentment and purpose in your work, no matter how menial it may seem.” Seneca the Younger
- "I am not a product of my circumstances. I am a product of my decisions." Stephen Covey
- "Until you view yourself as the author of your life, you will be the victim of it. You won't be a participant. You will merely be an observer of what happens to you and around you." Andy Stumpf
Action Questions:
- What specific challenges am I currently facing, and how am I acknowledging them without emotional judgment?
- How can I ensure that I approach my challenges with rational thoughts rather than emotional reactions?
- What strategies can I use to mentally accept situations that are out of my control?